When I Use To Rap
TBT to sometime in 1996 when I use to rap with 2 of my best friendsš¤. We called ourselves āLyrical Mindsā & actually won 2nd place in Montrealās hip hop contest that yearš
Looking back at some of my lyrics, I remember being 16 & already ready to dieš

Some of my lyrics went like this:
āWho you think you are, walking around like youāre the big starāļø Giving me the looksš, donāt you know I never shook? Iām the crook Naturally born to suffer, they canāt control my angerš” so I gotta drink that liquorš„My future is to blame, lost in the maze of the street game, damn canāt handle the painš
Traumatized since the day I realized That life is full of lies & cries when a homie diesš°
Problems getting blown away cause Iām sipping Tanqueray š¾
Wishing somebody loved me enough to raise & teach meš„°
I never understoodš¤, my parents never took care of me just like they should, got me stranded in the hood I could always suicide but nah still got my prideā
So what will I do with all the shit I keep inside?š¤
God if you here me, please let me out of hereš
Cause shit aināt going good, I could see that my death is nearāā ļø
Looking at this todayš§, I know Iām a survivor. I could have died or killed myself so many times since but I fought with everything I had.
Now that Iām working on my healing, I know I need to go back & take care of herš. We always hear about recovery & parenting our inner child but we also need to do the same for the teenager within.
I call her āSarah Bluntā cause that was what my friends called me back then because I use to sell drugsš³. She was cold, angryš¤ & in a lot of painš„ She still shows up in my present life sometimes, when O donāt feel safe or I feel threatened. Iām learning to love her and give her the things she needed back then that she didnāt getā¤ļø...you all should do the sameāļø